This is one of those odd things that has become taboo with women.
Even with my friends, they’re often worried to have these conversations.
I had a friend once that desperately wanted to get real with this subject matter and all I did was try to comfort instead of just letting her vent her fears for a moment.
Because it is a subject that even I can’t help but shrivel up under it.
Some really messed up women will downright refuse to even consider the existence of their market value.
Some intentionally run from it.
But all women are aware of it. Whether they are working towards it or hiding from it or actively sabotaging it.
This is the darkest of psychologies at play with women that do porn and what makes some sex workers so loud and defensive.
Porn does lower the market value.
I saw a lot of women in porn deal with it by getting more and more obnoxious.
When people get louder and more obnoxious in defense of themselves they always remind me of chimpanzees.
And chimpanzees will rip people’s arms off. So I don’t argue with chimpanzees.
What is market value?
Here’s my interpretation of market value.
As a woman lots of men want to sleep with me. Since I’m also attractive even more men want to sleep with me. And since I’m also very charming and engaging even more men want to sleep with me.
But that does not determine my market value. What determines my market value are the men I like.
The men I like do want to sleep with me. I’m hot and I’m very charming and when I like a person I’m not a bitch. I’m very sweet, submissive and easy to please.
So the men I like, like me.
Do they want to commit to me? I’m single, so obviously not.
If I do my math properly my market value is off. I haven’t yet been able to get what I want.
A man’s sexual market value is very different. I really hope I’m not going to get the wrong person reading this because what I’m about to say might be offensive.
Men’s sexual market is not determined by whether or not they can get into a relationship.
Lots of women will lower their standards for a relationship.
I’ve even been tempted to now and then. But that shouldn’t be so shocking.
Standards are usually imaginary scenarios being played out in the mind. They don’t have a lot to do with the reality of actually bonding with a human being. Which can be so complex it cannot be predicted.
Plus standards can wear off. You can get everything within your standard and find out it was the wrong standard.
But that’s a separate point. The main point here is that most women will drastically raise their standards for a one night stand but lower their standards for a relationship.
Everyone negotiates with life.
We don’t need to all act like we’ve all got it so together or so figured out.
We all look into our minds and say ‘if I can have this I can go without that’
It can be a very frightening thing to do.
So I can fully understand why talking about a woman’s sexual market value has become sort of taboo.
I can understand it from my own experience. Which is that I want to be overwhelmed by desire for a man and then simply be able to give into that man and commit to him for the rest of my life.
But most often that’s not what is going to happen. I’m going to spend most of my time fending off men I have zero interest in.
And when I meet a man I’m extremely attracted to I’ll have to fight off the desire. Because it’s very likely that if I give into the desire the man will get what he wants but I will not get what I want. I’ll get abandoned.
And even when I can rationalize all this stuff and understand it from my own point of view and someone else’s point of view, it doesn’t matter.
Because my instincts very desperately want to feel safe and secure. And the safety and security men provide is so fulfilling on such a deep level that losing it is going to be painful.
It’s physical.
It’d be like cutting off your arm and trying to rationalize the pain away.
It’s not possible.
It’s pretty easy to understand why a woman would be afraid to discuss hacking off her own arm.
It’s just the nature of things.
As a woman I have a lot to contend with.
Men also have a lot to contend with.
But we’re fighting opposite things until we find the person we can form an alliance with.
Dating is not fucking easy. It’s goddamn war.
A genuine connection and relationship with a human being its own unique thing. It’s not apart of the war. It’s in its own separate universe.
Jess lanai 